Self-esteem is confidence in your own worth and abilities, but it is so much more than that. In his book The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem, Nathaniel Branden shows us how self-esteem can be the basis for a meaningful and enriching life.
These pillars or principles begin with the individual, and enable you to take conscious action and move to higher levels. However, we can also implement the self-esteem implications of developing healthier, happier and more proactive individuals in homes, schools, and communities. Here are some key ideas from the book and explain the pillars of self-esteem.
The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem
1. Live Consciously
“Most other people. Their thoughts are someone else’s opinions, their lives are an imitation, their emotions are a quote.” – Oscar Wilde
Branden states that our mind is a tool for survival, and that living unconsciously betrays our mind. Deceiving yourself makes you lose unity with your mind, which leads to a loss of happiness and contentment. Indulging in addiction, drug use and other mentally harmful activities causes us to miss out on something essential for short-term pleasure.
2. Accept yourself
In the book, Nathaniel emphasizes self-acceptance as refusing to be in a negative relationship with yourself. It is the process of maintaining harmony with and acknowledging yourself. This process also involves changing thinking patterns in comparison, criticism, denial, and judgment. Developing our potential can only begin after we recognize our feelings and stop lying to ourselves.
3. Take 100% responsibility
Taking responsibility for everything in your life – how you act, feel and think, can make a huge positive impact. The principle of self-responsibility focuses on the individual. Branden states that no one owes you the fulfillment of your desires. It is in your hands to achieve what you want.
4. Be yourself
As explained in the book, the principle of assertiveness is essential to authenticity. This means being yourself and respecting who you are in all human encounters. To be self-assertive, you have to stand up for yourself, treat yourself with respect, and be honest about who you are.
5. She has a purpose in life
According to Nathaniel, the purpose of life is not a mental creation but a sense of mastery achieved by completing and excelling at tasks. While it is common to see our work only as a conduit for purpose and effectiveness, we can also apply this principle to our relationships. Self-discipline is necessary to establish a sense of purpose. It is the ability to set the right goals for yourself and work towards them over time.
6. Personal Integrity
Being one of the six pillars of self-esteem, self-integrity can be defined as living in harmony with your values. It is one of the most complex principles to put into practice but also the most useful. This means not compromising your values and sticking to your judgment. Doing something against our better judgment makes us fall in love, which leads to a loss of self-esteem.
Read more: Signs of low self-esteem
The six pillars of self-esteem primarily focus on controlling your actions, emotions, and thoughts. You can be more confident by accepting yourself, taking personal responsibility, assertiveness, living consciously and purposefully, and personal integrity.
Practicing the six pillars of self-esteem or developing any healthy habit requires motivation. Failure to understand or apply motivation incorrectly can derail your goals, halt your progress, and waste time and energy. Here are some Podcasts to help you gain insight and better motivate yourself.
participation in Your mental healing For more ideas on self-esteem, book reviews, and information to help you live purposefully.